Afraid and Trusting

"When I am afraid, I put my trust in you."  Ps. 56:3, NIV

We got some devastating news this week.  One of our family members is facing a scary health crisis.  When I meet these types of challenges, my first intention is to meet the crisis with faith.  But I must admit that, at times, something inside me sinks.  I feel like retreating rather than attacking.  I feel like tucking and running.

Have you ever struggled with these types of spiritual conflicts?  There is almost a schizophrenia or two-mindedness. A war between the spirit man and the natural. A conflict between fear and faith; doubt and belief.

I wish I were one of those "super Christians" who always is on spiritually.  But, alas, I am just a flesh and blood believer.  Sometimes I feel weak.  Intimidated.  Other times, I feel invincible.  Revved up and bullet-proof.

As I fought to gain traction in my faith response, I realized that something in me was disappointed that God had not averted this crisis from us.  I wanted deliverance.  Protection.  But instead, He provided a "walk through."  A situation that will require us to lean on Him.  Listen more closely.  Something to stretch our faith and challenge our comfort. 

Then the question came to mind.  If God only kept us from trouble, what kind of witness would we have?  What kind of followers would He have?  Probably droves of people signing on for an easy, cheap, rendition of discipleship.  A protection plan sans the required devotion.

That is the not the kind of weak, wimpy, followers that God is seeking.  He is seeking ordinary men and women like the young David, who amidst bullying, ridicule and rejection, arose to slay a giant.  With one smooth stone.  And the Rock of Ages!

He is seeking women like Esther, who will rise up, "for such a time as this."  He is seeking people like Paul and Silas who will preach and proclaim even if it means imprisonment or death.

He is seeking those who will dare to follow him in radical obedience.  Overcoming faith.  Blind trust.  Oh, God, that I would rise to the challenge!

Dear Lord, I need you.  I pray that you will cause my spirit man to rise up in confidence and strength.  Forgive me for accepting defeat, when you purchased victory.  Sanctity my thoughts, my mind, my faith.  I make a choice to believe in You and to wait on your deliverance.  I admit I am afraid.  But while I am, I WILL trust in you.  In Jesus' Name.  Amen.

 

 

© Sherri Evans Ministries 2015. All rights reserved. Used by permission. For booking schedule and information: sherrievans@sherrievansministries.com